atla fic (ozai/ursa)

[ladyhoneydarlinglove]

Fandom: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Characters: Ozai, Ursa
Rating: PG-13
Summary: An interpretation of Ozai's and Ursa's relationship; how they fell in love, and then became lost.
Notes: Written in the wake of The Search, which is dumb. I refuse to accept it as part of ATLA canon. REFUSE.

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I

Ursa is only seventeen when she first meets Prince Ozai. He is few years older than her, handsome and clever, prone to making her blush at inopportune moments. While Fire Lord Azulon meets with her father, the Magistrate of Hira’a, she tries to keep the Prince entertained with poetry and a few pieces of theater that she knows.

She feels embarrassed—surely a Prince must be used to much more grandiose performances!—but Prince Ozai smiles and claps and tells her that she’s very talented. Perhaps he will see her perform at the Royal Palace someday.

Ursa blushes and begs him not to tease. Ozai takes her hand and assures her he was not joking.

II

The Fire Lord and the Prince return a few months later; Ozai tells Ursa that they are trying to strengthen ties with the town, and her family specifically. Fire Lord Azulon is very interested in their relation to Avatar Roku, and what benefit a match might bring to the royal family.

Her parents pretend as though the visit is nothing to worry about, but Ursa is not stupid. When she takes Ozai on a walk through the manor gardens in the evening, she asks him if he intends to marry her.

He is shocked by her forwardness at first, but also intrigued, and answers truthfully that yes, that was the intention. This does not surprise Ursa; but she is rather taken aback when Ozai ducks his gaze and mumbles nervously that the marriage will only happen if she is willing, of course.

Ursa knows this isn’t true—the marriage will happen whether she likes it or not—but the blush on Ozai’s cheeks makes her heart soften. She takes his hand, and tells him shyly that she feels she would be very lucky to have a Prince as handsome and talented as Ozai.

They are engaged, and happily so, by morning.

III

They take Ursa to the capitol, a wondrously huge city that has her constantly looking every which way at all the new sites and sounds. While preparations for the wedding are made, Ozai takes her out whenever she wishes, to do whatever she wants; shopping, the botanical gardens, the royal zoo, the army barracks, the royal archives, the harbor, and so many other places besides.

But Ursa’s favorite experiences by far are those at the theaters; so many of them, all performing something new and exciting! They go to as many shows as they can manage, and while Ursa can tell Ozai is not nearly as fascinated by the theater as she is, he goes without complaint and always indulges her gushing reviews on the rides back to the palace with a smile.

She becomes embarrassed sometimes, knowing that she must seem childish in her glee, but Ozai assures her that he finds her enthusiasm delightful and invigorating. He’s lived here all his life and has never explored the city as much as he does when with her; she’s opened his mind to new world of places and opportunities.

He confides in her that he hopes they will be able to share experiences like these for many years to come. Ursa does as well.

IV

By the time of the wedding, Ursa has fallen in love with Ozai, and he with her. She is beyond gleeful on her wedding day, and it shows in her radiant smile and the glow of her skin.

Her only complaint is that she wishes the ceremony were a little more private, so she could spend time with her new husband away from the eye of the public. But when she whispers this jokingly to Ozai during Fire Lord Azulon’s toast, he tells her with a smile to be patient; they will have plenty of time in private later.

And oh, how her patience pays off.

V

Their first years together are blissfully happy; a fairytale romance, a young maiden and her Prince. They are completely enamored of each other; nobody makes Ursa feel as beautiful, as talented, as loved, as Ozai does. He indulges her fancies, whispers to her often of how much he loves her, and holds her tenderly every night when they go to bed.

They have their problems of course; sometimes Ozai gets frighteningly angry, and she refuses to speak to him until he’s calmed down. Sometimes she becomes too outspoken on things and he hisses at her to hold her tongue. Sometime they bicker, and sometimes they fight. Sometimes Ursa sleep in a separate room.

But they always make up, and Ursa would not trade her husband for anyone in the world.

VI

She has a first child four years into the marriage; a beautiful baby girl that they name Azula, after her grandfather. Ursa cries when she holds the baby for the first time; Ozai takes her into his arms, and his entire face glows with pride.

They will have the most beautiful family, he is sure. One beautiful daughter, and perhaps in the future a son, maybe more! It is only a shame that their children will not be able to ascend the throne.

Ursa is confused. Why should their family need to ascend the throne? Surely Iroh, and then his son, will make for fine Fire Lords?

Ozai’s face darkens, and he glares sharply at her before shoving the baby back into her arms and storming out. Ursa is upset and has no idea what to do, and her agitation makes Azula start to cry.

It takes a long time to quiet the baby, longer still for Ursa to tell herself that it was nothing, and that everything is fine.

VII

But it isn’t fine.

The changes happen slowly at first, as Ozai begins to truly shoulder the duties of a Prince. No longer the carefree young man he was when Ursa met him, Ozai now has numerous duties to attend to, particularly ones concerning the war. That combined with the stress of a newborn begins to take its toll of him; he’s more agitated, quicker to anger, slower to smile and laugh as he once did.

Ursa remains willfully blind at first; she tells herself that Ozai needs time to adjust, and that soon everything will return to normal. But as the years pass, Ozai becomes more embroiled in the war, grows closer to his bitter father, and begins to taste the desire for power and control that so easily corrupts men.

Ursa sees him begin to resent Iroh for being first-born. She sees him grow angry at his father for putting Iroh before him, though he believes himself to be better suited to the throne. She sees him tell his daughter how she will grow up to be the most talented child the Fire Nation has ever seen, and how Azulon will soon see the error of his choice.

Ursa sees all of this, and yet she does nothing, because Ozai still holds her tenderly at night, and whispers that he loves her, and Ursa only wants to love Ozai and be loved by him. So she turns a blind eye to his faults, and pretends that she knows nothing about what he mutters to himself in the dark.

VIII

The second child is a boy, more capable of potentially ascending the throne than Azula, despite her now very apparent prodigy. Ozai is thrilled, though he keeps his joy mostly to himself.

Ursa continues to turn a blind eye as the boy grows, burying herself in her duties as a Princess; she aids the public, she funds the city, she makes collections for the royal palace, and she takes care of her children. She ignores how her husband sometimes forgets to come to bed at night, the dirty looks he gives whenever anyone mentions Iroh, the long hours he spends studying the war and staying at his father’s side.

It isn’t until Azula makes a loud and bold statement one day saying that father would make a far better Fire Lord than Uncle Iroh ever would does Ursa realize she’s been blind for too long.

IX

One night, as they lay in bed, Ursa tentatively brings the subject up to Ozai; shouldn’t he spend a little less time in the war room, and maybe some more with his brother, his children? His jealously seems a little apparent as of late, and she worries that he is becoming resentful.

It is only the screaming of baby Zuko in the next room and the subsequent rush of nursemaids that saves her from the worst of the beating.

Ursa never brings the subject up again after that. That night is enough to convince her just how far her husband has fallen.

X

She tries to help Azula, but the girl is already attached to her father with a bond that Ursa cannot hope to break. It brings her to tears to think that she must watch her daughter descend into this madness as well, and many nights, when Ozai is not there, Ursa sobs herself to sleep in the silence of their room.

She’s failed Ozai, she thinks. She’s failed Azula, only a child. What kind of a mother is she, to have failed a child so young? She despises herself.

Her only solace is Zuko, too young still to be touched by the bitterness and the anger that have swallowed Ozai and Azula. Ursa swears that she will not fail him too.

XI

It is a horrible thing, to watch as the people you love fall down into the abyss. As the years pass, Ozai becomes more and more like Azulon; full of contempt and rage, hungry for power, desperate to gain it by any means necessary. He loses his capacity to love, and Ursa knows that his family no longer means anything to him. The only thing Ozai cares about is the throne, and the power that comes with it.

Azula follows in her father’s footsteps, though Ursa still tries to bring her back. But the child is far too susceptible to the temptations that have all but drowned Ozai, and though Ursa fights desperately against it, there is nothing she can do for her daughter.

Instead, she redoubles her efforts to make sure her son will not share the same fate. She will not allow herself to fail. Not again.

XII

But she never loses hope that someday, somehow, Ozai might come back to her. Ursa knows things can never return to how they once were; she does not expect the carefree young man that she first fell in love with to come back. But she thinks that she still sees glimpse of him in this new, bitter Ozai, from time to time. She thinks that maybe if she waits, if she pushes gently, perhaps she can erase some of the contempt from Ozai’s heart. She still has hope. She still loves him.

Until she finds out what he plans to do to their son, and then she realizes that he is beyond redemption. Whatever was left of the man Ursa once loved is gone, and in his place is a cold, soulless bastard that Ursa hates with every fiber of her being.

She will never love him again. She will never forgive him. And she will die before she lets him have her son as well.